What's a Girl really?

It's funny to me how often I question why I am a girl. Mostly because I feel like I am bad at it. I don't always want to be girly and make up sometimes is just a hassle, heck sometimes I just throw my hair in a pony tail and go with it. Though I also know all of those I just mentioned is something almost every girl I talk to goes through those ups and downs. However, as a girl it made me question what is it that society, and even the church, tell us it's like to be a girl. It seems like though many girls my age want someone to be their earthly god. Whether you are a christian girl or not, the world and even the church tells this very different perception of what a girl should be. Sadly, a lot of times both places portray an image of completion with a man, not completion with God. This sets us [Girls] up for some complications.


1. Self-confidence:
I have my battles with self confidence. Many of the time it has to deal with my weight or my book smarts or music talent and the list goes on. I am constantly reminding myself that my worth isn't held in worldly ideals but the fact that I am the daughter of the one true King. It pains me though when I see girls my age or younger than I struggling with this to an extreme that it controls their life. Everyone always talks about these girls who fish for compliments with status' like "#Ugly" or "I am so gross guys" but what does anyone do to change this? A few weeks ago a girl my younger cousin's age posted a picture on a social media site that did just that. As I starred at the picture it pained me to think, what have I done to even change this? I taught this girl in a summer lesson where we talked about relationships but had I gotten it all wrong? Should I have spent less time giving them examples of perfection and what life should be like and more time spending teaching those girls what God-centered lives look like. I quickly responded to the girl, not out of a worldly stance but I tried my best to take a biblical stance. I quoted Songs of Solomon 4:7 and told her she physically the way God want's her to be, but that isn't enough. It isn't enough as an older girl to tell these girls they are pretty, I have to demonstrate it. We all [Women and girls alike] have to demonstrate to these younger girls what pure confidence is like. Here are some ways:

1. Accept that your gift, is different {1 Corinthians 12}

2. You are your own type of beautiful {Songs of Solomon 4:7}

3. God loves you {The whole bible really, but check out John 3:16}

2. Date those church boys

Now do not take what I am saying you MUST be equally yoked. HE MUST LEAD YOU! Am I getting my point across? You must have man who is strong in his walk with CHRIST and who is willing to lead you and y'all relationship to CHRIST. However, in the church we are often told that we have to date now at the age of 12 [I hope people aren't telling 12 year olds to date]. The truth is God has made that one person for you, sure it may be one of those boys that sit next to you in youth group but at age 12, 13,14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19 and sometimes 20 boys probably aren't able to take on the role of spiritually leading you. Not saying that they aren't a great Christian boy, because I know very many good christian boys that aren't ready to bring on a wife to their spiritual ride and if you are dating and marriage isn't your purpose, then you shouldn't be dating. Girls, be patient. 

3.You're not really you until you are with a man {A la completion via a boy} 

I was watching chick flicks [Cause I enjoy them, because I am a chick] and the story is always the same. It generally is two people of opposite personalities, cultural backgrounds, and so on meet, have some really hardcore beginning then something happens, they break up, the girls cries and eats, the boy does some romantic gesture to win her back and they live happily ever after. The sad thing is somewhere in our minds, us girls get the sense that we aren't you we are suppose to be until we are with a boy. Many movies portray girls as damsels in distress who's in the need of saving. News flash!! Jesus did that 2,000 some years ago. Also no guy on this planet, no matter how gorgeous, smart, romantic, etc. is going to be enough to save you. He too had to be saved by Christ and therefore will not be able to even match the love of Christ. So a little word of advice, if you ever want to be fully happy in a relationship, first learn that Christ is enough and that you are only completed with Christ and Christ alone. 


4. You can change him 
The bible is continually warning us about being equally yoked in relationships and how bad company corrupts bad character. But for some unknown reason to me, girls [Including me] feel that with a little TLC we'll change that boy. I've seen this with my friends where they compromise and then end up getting hurt when they realize that the guy cannot be changed. I also dealt with this in my last relationship. I wanted so bad to help him and my dad just told me that only God and him can change him. So if he isn't where he needs to be in his walk with Christ, one of two things need to happen. 1. Either just be friends and keep it there or 2. If you see projection where he'll be a godly leader one day, be patience. 

So at this point I've realized these points are really relationship points so here's one that isn't on relationships. 

5. Modesty = Out of fashion 
The older I get modesty has become a huge issue/part of my life. Physically I am a bigger girl. Clothes are too tight and revealing. I am also tall, if you didn't know tall + big booty= everything dress and skirt related is shorter... With that disclaimer out lately modesty has been a big focus of mine, especially in college. But modesty doesn't mean I am out of fashion. Modesty just means you have to search a little harder to find cuter clothes. I love Pinterest [For many reasons] but one of them is that it shows me that I can be super cute in modest clothing. Not only that but a lot of things I like style wise are more modest anyway. On another note, I saw on Twitter today a girl making fun of a post that compared the world's view of clothing [Generally more revealing] and God's idea of keeping yourself pure in what you where. She stated that she think God doesn't care. God does care, not only for your sake but for the boys around you. 

For a little treat, here's a video about bikini's on the ideas of modesty :) 

Thanks for reading my blog!! :) 

Amanda :)