1. Force Him to Move On
If he's still hung up on an ex, don't sit there and try to make him forget her so easily. He'll get over her eventually and if he doesn't then let him be. One has to go through the process of moving on [Some do this faster than others] and there ain't anything anyone can do to change that.
2. Search for a Savior
I don't know how to stress this more but that boy will not save you. The movies are wrong. There's a man who did this 2,000 years ago for you and HE did that far more better than any evil man that walks this Earth. That man was Jesus.
3.Try to Save Him
We've all had those boys in our life who fall into the wounded puppy category. As women our need to comfort and nurse them back to health is overwhelming. Usually though we try and try and still are the ones that get hurt. Just like with the ex, the boy has to fight his own demons and battles that rage inside him. A man also died for him and is willing to save him just as HE saved you. Again in case you weren't aware "HIM" is Jesus.
4. Be unequally Yoked
Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness?
I know some women {My mom being one of them} who got their husband to go to church. HOWEVER! When getting into a relationship with a man who is not strong in his walk leads to several bad situations 1. He won't be able to lead you 2. He is more likely to compromise 3. You are more willing to compromise. If a boy is perusing you who isn't strong in his walk with Christ, be friends with him. The same however also goes for you. If you are single now work on your relationship with Christ, don't wait till you are in a relationship to fix that.
5. Trade sex for love
Yes one of the many functions we have is for sexual purposes. Sex though isn't love. Love isn't sex. So don't trade sex to get him to love. It only ends in hurt, trust me.
6. Hold past sins against Him
If a boy is willing to share with you his past, don't hold it against him. Chances are those past sins made him who he is today, the man you are attracted to. We all have a past that is shameful for us and if someone is willing to put themselves in a vulnerable position to tell you that, don't be a jerk and hold it over their head.
7. Disrespect Him
God created men to be the head of the household and the leader in your relationship. God has programed them to do so, so when you disrespect your man especially to others, this is especially hurtful. Don't get me wrong, I am by no means telling you to be a doormat. If he is doing something that you don't agree with tell him respectfully, don't call him out in front of his friends. Don't bad mouth him to your friends either. Be classy.
8. Bad Mouth Your X
Bad mouthing your ex is either trashy, means you aren't over him or both. At some point that boy you are bad mouthing you had genuine feeling about. If you sit there and bash him then the boy you are either in a relationship with or seeking a relationship with sees that you're probably not over him or that when you two break up you're going to do the same thing. Follow the rule, if you don't have anything nice to say don't say anything at all. Now I know, there's that ex who cheated on you with the whole cheerleading squad and is a major jerk, but there's a way at presenting the truth that isn't trashy.
9. Be Someone Differnt
When I was a Junior my mom use to tell me when I padded down the stairs in sweat pants and a t-shirt with my hair flopped on top of my head that the boy I had a crush on wouldn't like me. My excuse for my laziness was 'If he doesn't like me in sweats then he won't love me'. However when I sought after boys I'd always change myself. Now I just figure if he doesn't like me before we are dating for who I am, then if we get married he's gonna wake up and realize I am not who he thought I was. So be you, be the quirky beautiful you that God created you to be because God also created someone who is going to love you for those quirks.
10. Lower Standards
By lowering your standards I mean don't date someone just because you are feeling lonely. Figure out what's important to you {Mine are: A godly leader, someone who can make me laugh, someone who respects me and a family man} and stick to them. Outside of those, sure I have a physical type and some things that draw me to a man, but then again I also don't know the man I am going to marry and he may not fit the physical mold I have set out. But I won't date a serious-anti children- disrespectful atheist because that would be lowering my standards. Wait on God, he'll fill that loneliness way better than some Joe Blow you find off the street.
-Amanda :)
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